Spectacular! Brilliant! Super! Epic!
In a 2011 survey, researchers found that 87% of adults agreed with the notion that “children need praise in order to feel good about themselves.”
It’s very natural for us to want to reward our students’ and children’s efforts with praise.
You know when you get into a heated disagreement with a partner, child, or roommate, and accidentally let loose one of those generalizations that is the conversational equivalent of throwing gasoline on a fire?
Like “Why do you always have to be late? It’s not like all that extra time in front of a mirror is going to change anything.” or “Why are you so lazy? Is it really that hard to pick up the wet towels off the floor?”
Remember how that worked out for you?
Yeah…we generally do a pretty good job of steering clear of these obvious land mines.
Perfectionism has traditionally been seen as a bad thing. A character defect. A “fast track” to unhappiness, depression, and anxiety.
Have you ever wanted desperately to gain the approval of someone? Whether in a concert, audition, or jury, to impress them with the warmth of your sound, purity of intonation, and profundity of musical insight?
How’d it go?
Often, the more intensely we need approval, the more likely it is we end up with disinterest or disapproval instead.
After all, consider what happens when you walk into the room and lock eyes with members of your jury.
You know those “1 weird trick” ads that offer to get you a flat belly or $1000 dollars in no time? They’re awfully tempting to click on, aren’t they?
I think it’s natural to want a silver bullet. A counter-intuitive practice strategy. A paradigm-busting tactic for managing nerves.